An admittedly weird quirk of mine is to judge others based on the level of assumption and presumption they live their life by. This is admittedly difficult, as we all carry long-term assumptions, regardless of how substantiated they are. It’s a deep part of our evolutionary behavior; those who carried the most assumptions in our hunter-gatherer days tended to be the ones who avoided disease and predation. But as society grew more complex, and continues to do so, assumption is little more than defective behavior. To live your life in a state of presumption is to live it with an extra set of eyes you inexplicably keep closed.
There’s no real rhyme to how I level judgment, which is okay because my judgment is of zero consequence anyhow. Presumptions as to my level of competency can be hot buttons for me. I try not to, but I lose a little respect for managers who assume I’ve widely misunderstood a simple concept based on a small mistake, likely one made simply because I did not have time to finish a chore before leaving for the day. I keep quiet when men think I’ve said “ma’am” instead of “man,” usually only pointing out their idiocy if they begin to give me shit based on their mistake.
There are assumptions made out of fear, though, and those are a little harder to hold against people. I had one woman break up with me because she assumed that if we broke up we wouldn’t be friends any longer. How do you get mad over something that innocent? Another broke things off because she thought she was angering me. I don’t know why she thought this, but when it came to light I thought to myself We throw away our years based on assumption.
We avoid jobs we assume we can’t do. We ignore degrees we assume we can’t master. We keep our heads down because we assume the light of day is too bright to behold. Loves are missed because we assume the other person isn’t interested. We are safe, we are adventurous, we fail, because we presume things should be the way we make them be.